Graverobbers Wanted: No Experience Necessary

The Horror Writers Association Presents

BLOOD LITE

...a collection of entertaining tales that puts the fun back into dark fiction, with ironic twists and tongue-in-cheek wit to temper the jagged edge.

Charlaine Harris reveals the dark side of going green, when a quartet of die-hard environmentalists hosts a fundraiser with a gory twist in "An Evening with Al Gore"...In an all-new Dresden Files story from Jim Butcher, when it comes to tracking deadly paranormal doings, there's no such thing as a "Day Off" for the Chicago P.D.'s wizard detective, Harry Dresden...Sherrilyn Kenyon turns a cubicle-dwelling MBA with no life into a demon-fighting seraph with one hell of an afterlife in "Where Angels Fear to Tread"...Celebrity necromancer Jaime Vegas is headlining a sold-out séance tour, but behind the scenes, a disgruntled ghost has a bone to pick, in Kelley Armstrong's "The Ungrateful Dead." Plus tales guaranteed to get under your skin — in a good way — from Janet Berliner Don D'Ammassa Nancy Holder Nancy Kilpatrick J. A. Konrath and F. Paul Wilson Joe R. Lansdale Will LudwigsenSharyn McCrumb Mark Onspaugh Mike Resnick Steven SavileD. L. Snell Eric James Stone Jeff Strand Lucien Soulban Matt Venne Christopher Welch

So let the blood flow and laughter reign — because when it comes to facing our deepest, darkest fears, a little humor goes a long way!

Bram Stoker Award nominees James A. Moore (BLOOD RED) and Jeff Strand (PRESSURE) join forces for this 87,000-word action-packed, gore-drenched monster extravaganza.

Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Haunted Forest Tour!

Sit back and enjoy a smooth ride in air-conditioned comfort as your heavily armored tram takes you through nature’s most astonishing creation. The forest is packed to capacity with dangerous and terrifying creatures of all shapes, sizes, and hunger levels, and you’ll get to observe these wonders in complete safety.

Howl with a werewolf! Gaze into the glowing eyes of a giant spider! Look right through a spooky ghost! See horrific monsters you couldn’t even imagine, only inches away from you! Things with fangs, things with claws, things with dripping red jaws—you’ll see them all!

Not thrilling enough? Well, it’s Halloween, and so we’re offering a very special tour through the Haunted Forest. The new route goes deeper into the woods than any civilians have ventured before, and you’re guaranteed to get a good scare! Rest assured that every possible security precaution has been taken. The Haunted Forest Tour has a 100% safety record, and technical difficulties are unheard of. You will be in no danger whatsoever.

We promise.

A DYING MAN'S GREATEST TREASURE...

Mortimer Moorecook, retired Wall Street raider, avid collector, is losing his fight against cancer. With weeks to live, a package arrives at the door of his hillside mansion-an artifact he paid millions for...a hominoid skull with elongated teeth, discovered in a farmer's field in the Romanian countryside. With Shanna, his beautiful research assistant looking on, he sinks the skull's razor sharp fangs into his neck, and immediately goes into convulsions.

OPENS THE DOOR TO AN ANCIENT EVIL...

A rural hospital. A slow night in the ER. Until Moorecook arrives strapped to a gurney, where he promptly codes and dies.

WHERE DEATH IS JUST THE BEGINNING.

Four well-known horror authors pool their penchants for scares and thrills, and tackle one of the greatest of all legends, with each writer creating a unique character and following them through a vampire outbreak in a secluded hospital.

The goal was simple: write the most intense novel they possibly could.

Which they did.

A Word of Warning:

Within these pages, you will find no black capes, no satin-lined coffins, no brooding heartthrobs who want to talk about your feelings. Forget sunlight and stakes. Throw out your garlic and your crosses. This is the Anti-TWILIGHT.

An all original anthology from some of todays hottest supernatural writers, featuring stories of monsters from the monster's point of view.

In most stories we get the perspective of the hero, the ordinary, the everyman, but we are all the hero of our own tale, and so it must be true for legions of monsters, from Lucifer to Mordred, from child-thieving fairies to Frankenstein's monster and the Wicked Witch of the West. From our point of view, they may very well be horrible, terrifying monstrosities, but of course they won’t see themselves in the same light, and their point of view is what concerns us in these tales. Demons and goblins, dark gods and aliens, creatures of myth and legend, lurkers in darkness and beasts in human clothing… these are the subjects of The Monster’s Corner. With contributions by Lauren Groff, Chelsea Cain, Simon R. Green, Sharyn McCrumb, Kelley Armstrong, David Liss, Kevin J. Anderson, Jonathan Maberry, and many others.

In Graverobbers Wanted (No Experience Necessary), he took a job digging up a shallow grave. It turned out badly. In Single White Psychopath Seeks Same, he took a job as a bodyguard at a séance. It turned out worse. But now, meet the new, improved Andrew Mayhem. He has a real job. He's a better father and husband. And he's vowed to quit accepting money from strange women in coffee shops to perform tasks that go terribly, terribly wrong. This time he's just taking a relaxing camping trip with his family and best friend. No shortcuts. The gas tank is full. The sinister warning of the crazy old man is taken seriously. Unfortunately, when you're Andrew Mayhem, you just can't help being attacked by a group of savage killers bent on inflicting ghastly torture and bringing horrific death. Relentlessly pursued through a booby-trapped forest, it's one crisis after another as Andrew fights to protect his family, loses a body part or two, and faces the single darkest moment of his entire life. Action-packed, twisted, and completely outrageous, Casket For Sale (Only Used Once) is the funniest and scariest Andrew Mayhem adventure yet!

AN ANDREW MAYHEM THRILLER "Sometimes you wake up in the morning and you just know it's going to be the kind of day where you end up tied to a chair in a filthy garage while a pair of tooth-deprived lunatics torment you with a chainsaw. So as I struggled against the ropes, I can't say I was all that surprised." Yes, Andrew Mayhem, hero of the bestselling comedy/thriller Graverobbers Wanted (No Experience Necessary) is back. Still incredibly brave. Still ridiculously irresponsible. And this time, becoming chainsaw fodder is one of his lesser worries. He's forced to pose as a serial killer known as The Headhunter in order to infiltrate a group of maniacs who've gathered in an isolated Alaskan mansion for a weekend of murderous games. Can he free the potential victims in time…or will he be forced to participate in their demise? Even more twisted than its predecessor, Single White Psychopath Seeks Same is another outrageous blend of the hilarious and the horrifying, one that will keep you laughing, gasping, and guessing from beginning to end.